However, I'd like to take a moment to talk a bit about an incredibly brave little girl.
This morning I was snooping around on Facebook and had stumbled across a memorial link on a friend's page. Over the next hour I read about a beautiful 16 year-old girl who battled bone cancer for 6 years, over 100 radiation sessions and too many tumors to count that were found throughout her body. She passed away on Saturday and the funeral is today.
I got lost in memorial stories told by her friends and family about this phenomenal creature who battled hard and fought even harder. Can you imagine? Being 16, riddled with tumors and radiation, and through all the pain and difficult moments she knew the importance of love and living in the moment. She just knew.
Two things were inherently clear after reading these entries (some written by her about a week before she passed): she's the most courageous teenager I've ever read about in my entire life, and she had the most amazing support system I've ever seen.
Even towards the very end of her time here, the family made it very clear that all of them just wanted to enjoy one another, to just "be." That nothing needs to be "done," and often times moments are missed when that's all one is concerned about. She said at the end of it all, she wants people to learn something from this.
I certainly have.
So you see, writing a stupid blog today about all of our things on our "to do" list, our neuroses and resolvable issues regarding moving and unpacking and organizing seem not only counterproductive but ignorant, especially considering the mindset we'd like to someday achieve. It's harder for some people to do it. For us, it's hard to push through the stress and be positive and just "go with the flow" and know when to just stop and smell the roses. It's hard to put down boxes and paintbrushes and tools and step outside for a beer or a run with the dogs when we know we have stuff to do. However, we're determined to work hard at it. It's a conscious decision. Really, it's why I made this blog. When my end comes, I want to say that I've helped others, I've had the freedom to live as I choose, and that I've lived a full life.
The fact is that I am living and breathing. I'm not going through crazy amounts of chemotherapy. I have a home, and most importantly, love and the power of will and of inner peace. All of us have the chance to experience moments some never will, and need to revel in them. To respect life, to push the small stuff aside.
My girlfriend and I are not laid-back ladies. I struggle with obsessive-compulsive disorder and we're both hotheads. We're both positive people but we're easily derailed. These are things we recognize and live with, and try not to feed.
However, we're human, and in stressful situations we're reminded to check ourselves a bit.
After 2 days of high anxiety (which have now been lifted) brought on by ourselves, and worrying about everyday problems and feeling maxed out from moving, reading this story about a girl with bone cancer who is more strong and mature than anyone I know was just a smack in the face. She got what she wanted; I've certainly learned something. Her message was clear: all moments will happen regardless of how you try to change them. Life just is what it is, and it's what you make of it. Stop judging everything, start enjoying everything and just let things happen. Let things be. Teach others. Learn. Help those in need. Be a good human being.
Enjoy each moment. Savor everything.
